| = windshield?|
|sounds like rock lyrics :)|
i would switch the second line around a bit, "as if time would throw away his skin" (or "shed away").. i think it has a nicer rhythm.
also maybe "... invade my dreams"... just a thought.
I like the second part quite a lot (i like rock lyrics :)
| = thank you|
|Thank you for the suggestions and the appreciations. I generally do not change anything in my poems! Come again!|