| = or am I not? | Luminita Suse [22.Jan.04 04:02] |
| This could be a good poem if you just thought a bit before writing the first verse. I learned in school that our world has 4 dimensions and time is the fourth of them. That doesn’t mean you are wrong in that assertion. Maybe in a multidimensional world time would span across fourth dimensions, but really, at this stage, we only sense 4 of them. Am I right? | |
| = No. | Florian Ardelean [23.Jan.04 00:26] |
| If you asked me this then you really don't have the slightest idea about what I meant to say. But that's OK because I don't either. I write what I feel, and this upsets many of the poetry-maniacs on this site who prefer to build a poem rather than feel it. Another thing: what you learnt in school won't help you write or understand poetry. I like to think of my poems as very abstract forms of my thoughts and feelings, which can be interpreted in many ways. Feel free to write down your own understanding of the text, and perhaps I’ll give you mine. Please don't feel attacked by my seemingly hostile attidude, it's just that I've been very picky with my readers latley. Thanks for dropping by, and I apologise if I upset you. | |
| = lifetime | Anca Anghel Novac [23.Jan.04 07:29] |
| It is a vision that you speak about, a four-dimension vision about time. This "step inside"/ "step aside"/ "witness the world from behind" builds up the idea about time as a unit. And this is not about time in general, but ones lifetime. I liked the part where you say: "Step aside, make room for the second In which you will die" It looks like even dying is programmed to be a step, even aside, in this unit of time that is life. | |
| = timeless | Florian Ardelean [23.Jan.04 21:04] |
| Anca, I really liked your interpretation of the poem. Originally, I thought of it as expression of different points of view: how one?s suffering would look like to a clock. One big, ugly, noisy, clock - perhaps the very same one that greets me every morning when I return to reality from my dreamlands. That is, if I return to reality. Maybe one day we will live in a timeless world, but it seems like the future belongs to the age of technology, so in the end we'll all be... digital heroes. | |
| + step by step | Anca Anghel Novac [24.Jan.04 01:30] |
| Timeless world ? Who knows? Maybe. In the meantime we live in this world and we take each day, step by step, or one step at a time, or, as you said, "step inside" until one day we'll "step aside to make room for " that very last second. I missed yesterday the star. Sorry. It was obvious that I liked the poem and I enjoyed also to make comments. | |
| = Thank you. | Florian Ardelean [25.Jan.04 00:08] |
| Thank you. It's my very first star. I must admit I was a bit surprised when I saw it, because I posted the poem almost two months ago... better late than never, right? P.S. I was one step away from leaving agonia.net - I didn't feel like my poems were making much of an impression here. But now, I think I'll start writing again. | |
| = leave ? no way ! | Anca Anghel Novac [25.Jan.04 00:16] |
| Leave agonia.net ? Why, because sometimes we are ignorant and don't read everything? No, this would not be a good reason for you to be disappointed. You posted this poem long time ago? Well, I read it just now and liked it. Don't let things drag you down. In the end it doesn't matter what I as a reader think, It matter what you think and what you feel when you write. If this is your first star on English, I am glad. I have none. Should I leave? No :) Take care and keep writing. | |
| = typo | Anca Anghel Novac [25.Jan.04 00:18] |
| * .It matters | |
| = Come on in... | Florian Ardelean [25.Jan.04 01:54] |
| "It matters what you think and what you feel when you write" Indeed. Once again, thanks for stopping by, you're always welcome here. "Come on in, welcome to time" :) | |