| = ... | Laurenţiu Ion [23.Jun.09 23:38] |
| I recommend: hands that have put told story rushed passion | |
| = Many thanks in advance for your time. Best Regards . | oana blandiana betlevy [24.Jun.09 12:41] |
| Good Morning and many thanks for taking time by reading my little poem ; thank you also for the recommendations you have made; As an explanatory note for the text’s structure I have chosen; I would like to induce a bit of the Shakespearean’s rhythm to the text ; By using “that have put” I might break the “sound’, the” flow ” when reading the text out ; so for “a told story ” ….the key element is “ the story” ,as followed by “told” brings the steamy aspect of the gossips ;scandalously tend raised in a “foyer” ; The “passion” is for selfish women when trying to “conquest ” men ; the “Queen” uses the dignity when loving , although sometimes she gets trapped in a passion, as her heart gets rushed out from frustrations and ends in doubts. That’s what I have called a Shakespearean’s clue : the love. Shall I still change the text’s structure as recommended by you ? | |
| = ! | Laurenţiu Ion [24.Jun.09 12:44] |
| Ok, I will approve your text - (for your Shakespearean theme)! | |
| = oana | Constantin Delca [24.Jun.09 13:06] |
| i reckon is "conquer" instead of "conquest" in your comment. as for the poem, with the "crown" & "queen", reminds me of tarot cards cheers! | |
| = Warmest Regards | oana blandiana betlevy [25.Jun.09 10:58] |
| Thank you. | |
| = Warmest regards | oana blandiana betlevy [25.Jun.09 11:23] |
| yours : "conquer" instead of "conquest" is duly noted ; many thanks for reading my little poem ; | |