| = . | Veronica Valeanu [01.May.09 11:18] |
| if you say "magical bird" from the very beginning - there goes the magic! "rising" near "seizing " is too much "depth" instead of "deepness" | |
| = To Veronica | Constantin Delca [01.May.09 12:28] |
| I wasn't satisfied with it as well.I've made some changes and I hope it looks and sounds better now. Thanks a lot and keep a sharp eye, please! | |
| = I am pretty sure, Constantin... | John Willy Kopperud [01.May.09 21:38] |
| ...that the right expression in English in the last line must be"the deep" and not "depth". In every other way this is a readworthy poem! Cheers from Willy | |
| = ok | Constantin Delca [02.May.09 00:29] |
| I was thinking the same thing anyway and now I'm decided. This is the last alteration I'm going to do. Thanks a lot! | |