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Regret (unfinished)
prose [ ]
Lover of wispers

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by [Cathy ]

2005-09-04  |     | 



You wished me all the best when you made me suffer, but it wasn’t so, it was worst then pain. What can be worst? Loving alone… And I remained thinking at all the days you used to love me. It was so good to feel your lips on my lips, but your soul is gone, how lost is mine, and I still don’t understand how come you wanted me and now you don’t.
I was dreaming last night… when you appeared again in my world, and I was wrong because, I don’t know why but, I can’t kiss you anymore. Can you believe such a thing, what pain inside me and I couldn’t move. I froze in my dreams, in my illusions, in my self and in pain. It hurt to kiss you the same way it hurt to choose Regret. The pain inside me, born out of you, felt by the world.
Don’t vanquish me world, let me keep my hope, don’t estrange me from us, keep me close and I will be the only one to die… it’s useless that you come with me…
And if I can no longer kiss you, when I know I still want you, when I look for you in my world and theirs, yours and not ours, mine without you. If I can pass over the bricks of my soul tell me, lover of pain, what can I do to be able, to pass over the bricks of your soul… over my pain… that is not our pain… over my love…that is not our love?
All I want is to burn but to know that I’m not alone, to yell but not with the echo, to dream…and to be able to kiss you… Can you help me, lover of blood…?
Lover of hate, of lost souls and worn-out dreams, of nights of storm and days of death… I walk towards you through the wilderness of the crazy life but, what is wrong with you, I see you and I loose you… I will find you again, I will feel you, don’t walk towards me… you can see me but I am no longer here…
Behind you lover of longing… and I am headed towards you, running from a nightmare of my dream… unfulfilled dreams of me and you, that will not be of us… choose…
Lover of tears of ice… lover of fear of completion and sacrifice… in fact you want me… I… such pain of reality… lover of me that will be of us, both like yesterday…
I wish you all the best when I make you suffer, but it will not be so, will be much better then love. What can be better? Loving in pair… And I will remain thinking at all the days you will be loved. It will be so good to be kissed, and your soul will be, how lost is mine, and I still don’t understand how come I wanted you and now I give up so that I can Regret.
I will dream tonight… (unfinished)

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